Rangatahi informed responses to online harm
Please be advised that the following blog post contains explicit descriptions of online harm, which may be triggering or disturbing to some readers. Reader discretion is strongly advised, and we recommend proceeding with caution.
As a young person, I have experienced online sexual harrassment and image based abuse. Between the ages of 13-15 I was pressured into sending images and messages I didn’t want to send. I was catfished, but also harassed by people I knew and trusted. I have friends who have experienced similar things, and worse. To this day, at 18, I very occasionally receive messages and images of a sexual nature that I do not want to receive, from scam accounts and mutual friends.
I have pretty much never been made to feel valid in my experiences through organisations such as netsafe, as a victim of image based abuse and sexual harassment online. What has helped and supported me is rangatahi and other people with similar experiences, and people who actually listen. People who don’t blame me for my experiences. Victim blaming, in my experience, and experiences of people I know is never helpful.
I created a survey and distributed it to my friends, peers and their friends and peers and have received consultation that proves to me just how important this issue is for young people. The survey remains open and includes consultation with individuals I consider rangatahi, and are from the ages of 11-30. I have 62 responses at the time of writing this piece, with 47% of responders being between the ages of 17-19, 37% being between the ages of 14-16, 7% being between the ages of 23-25, 5% being between the ages of 20-22, 3% being between the ages of 26-30 and 1% being between the ages of 11-13.
The survey has responses from different gender identities, women/girls, men/boys and non binary and gender diverse individuals across Aotearoa. Most of the responses are from those who identify as women or girls.
In one question, I ask participants to state whether or not they have received nude or sexually explicit photos without their consent. A large percentage, roughly 74% percent of participants, have. A further 56% of individuals have been asked to send nude or explicit images of themselves to another person. Most participants know of people who have been sent nude photos they didn’t want to receive them, and know people who have also been asked to send photos of themselves when they didn’t want to.
Roughly 82% of participants have been sent texts that are sexual or explicit in some nature, without consent. The average age of participants recieving sexually explicit images, content (including texts), is 14 years old.
Almost every participant agrees with the statement that they were not taught enough about sexual harrassment online. A lot of the information they learn about online issues includes “stranger danger” and cyber-bullying. Most participants stated that the sexual harassment towards them and their peers online was most likely perpetrated by people they know and mutual friends. While stranger danger is a valid piece of advice, we also need to spread awareness to society that it is not just strangers we have to be aware of. People we know can groom and harm us and the people we love, too. 61% of participants said they believe they weren’t, or haven’t yet, been taught enough about sexual harrassment online at school.
If you’re blaming someone who has experienced online sexual harassment and image based-abuse for sending the text, or image, or video in the first place, know this: every thought of blame, every judgement, every comment you make is nothing in comparison to what they say to themselves every day. Victims blame themself more than you ever can. The biggest victim-blamer, is the victim themself and they cannot heal while fighting your blame.
Accounts made (like one recently made by students at my own school last year) purposefully targeting students from certain schools, makes this a school-wide and educational issue.
Even if these accounts posting nudes of fellow students did not exist, this is still an issue that is relevant in schools and education. This just makes it more dire.
Rangatahi need support, need to know the consequences, how they can heal from this trauma, and support people they care about.
Rangatahi should be part of the solution, part of prevention, not the problem. We need to be involved in creating resources and creating education, because we are deprived of a sufficient education and support system if it is not built for us, with consultation from us.
Revenge porn and sexual harassment online of any kind can cause Rangatahi to feel suicidal, depressed and anxious. Young kids so much as thinking of harming themselves over this makes it a health issue, an educational issue, a political issue and a safety issue.
Resources
If you or anyone else is in immediate danger, call 111
If you or anyone else has a crime to report relevant to online safety but it is not immediate, call 105
If you need to talk, free call 1737 24 hours a day.
Text YOUTHLINE at 234
And for resources for LGBTQIA+ rangatahi, see RAINBOW YOUTH